Dear Cockroaches,
Hi. Please stop being fifty feet tall and stomping around the dumpster when I go to take my trash out.
It makes me look crazy when I leave with garbage and come back with garbage.
Also, if I keep all my trash in my house, you'll try to move in here, too.
Don't you realize that nobody likes you? Not even your mom.
Sheesh. Do us all a favor and fuck off. Far away.
Sincerely,
Amanda
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